Personal Responsibility: 3 Ways to Enhance Your Happiness

Do you think taking personal responsibility causes more stress and anxiety? The opposite is true. When you accept personal responsibility, you free yourself from stress and anxiety, and it is the fastest way to regain control of your life.

Dr. Viktor Frankl proves this to be true even in the most extreme circumstances. Frankl was captured by the Nazis in 1942 and deported to work in various concentration camps. Despite these circumstances, he had the tools to keep his sanity and his life.

As a neurologist, he was aware that we always had the choice to take personal responsibility. By making that choice, despite captivity, he enjoyed greater freedom than some of his captors.

You will learn about that in this article and how to take charge of your life, regardless of your current situation.

What is personal responsibility?

Personal responsibility or individual responsibility means that you are responsible for your actions, in terms of the way you interact, as well as the things you do and say.

Personal responsibility is different from the definition of responsibility, which often refers to accountability for something, or being responsible for someone, like a leader or a parent. To better understand the personal responsibility, you have to understand its two types:

1. Positive responsibility: It generally means taking a proactive approach.
2. Interactive responsibility: It determines how you respond to situations, especially difficult ones, often toward others and yourself.

If you want to take charge and build a better life, both types of responsibility are important.

What does it mean to be responsible?

What do most people do when they get angry about incidents or other people? Most people would blame and complain right away, wouldn't they? They have the right to do that. However, no one - including you - gets better by doing so; rather, you take your freedom away.

For example, even when Viktor Frankl was captured by the Nazis, he took the ultimate responsibility for his life. Instead of getting angry or upset, he tried to help his fellow prisoners, joking with them and making them laugh. He even became a friend of some Nazis then.

Imagine that the Nazis captured you, separated you from your family, and forced you to work hard under harsh conditions. You would experience constant uncertainty about whether you would live or die, and you would never know whether you would see your family again.

How many people would give up in such situations? Almost everyone, which is obviously not surprising in one of the most depressing and dehumanizing places. The question is: Why didn't it affect Frankl?

First, he believed that life still had a purpose and that his suffering had meaning. He took personal responsibility for his attitude, behavior, and actions, so he was beloved in the concentration camp. Here's the best part of his story:

Some Nazis behaved that way because they feared the consequences. They themselves were psychologically captive. Although they could return to their homes at night, Frankl felt more freedom than them.

The story's point is that you have an incredible amount of personal power if you only take responsibility for it. You can read the incredible story of Viktor Frankl in his book Man Searches for Meaning.

Benefits of being responsible

Viktor Frankl's story shows the amazing power of personal responsibility. It can make a difference in your life if you want to stay in control and build a better future. As scary as responsibility might seem, its benefits will chnage your life.

1. Better focus and creativity

The irresponsible person looks for someone to blame or complain about the problems, unlike the responsible person who acknowledges problems and seeks to solve them. What will happen when you focus on finding a solution instead of blaming yourself? You will become more creative, focused, and positive. Moreover, people will love your company.

2. Better self-control

Personal responsibility is more like a mental shift than anything else. When you do this shift, you will find it much easier to control yourself in difficult situations. Taking responsibility helps you face difficult situations because when a challenge arises, you go back to the habits you built over time. The habit of taking responsibility will enable you to act better and look for solutions.

3. Achieving more goals

No matter how much you are prepared, life will strike you once in a while. So, the question is not how to avoid it, rather, how to adapt to the new reality quickly. In other words, when you fall, how quickly can you get back on your feet?

When you stop looking for someone to blame and take responsibility, you focus on the things you can control, like finding solutions and progress. This is how you will be more successful and happy.

4. Freedom

Blaming someone or something is a great way to take away your freedom because when you blame or complain, you are basically telling yourself that you are not in control, and that you can only change the situation and progress when the external circumstances change.

It is the easiest way to live your life, but waiting for external circumstances to change is very frustrating, especially if your livelihood depends on it.

5. Joy and happiness

Imagine that you got into a car accident, and it wasn't your fault. You now have two simple options. Your first option is to blame the other person. Although you have every reason to do so, imagine how you would feel. You will not feel much better after getting upset with someone, right? It also will not solve the problem.

There is no winner in these situations. Instead, taking responsibility reduces stress and increases happiness.

Signs that you might be avoiding responsibility

The victim is the opposite of the responsible personality, and the victim mentality is one of the most debilitating mentalities, which you should stay away from. People who feel that they are victims believe that the whole world is against them, and they have difficulty trusting and forgiving people.

Even worse, they look for hard evidence of their inability to move forward in life, and for someone or something to blame. In this case, the evidence that makes them hold on to certain beliefs weaken them and prove they were a victim causing disastrous results.

How to know that you are evading responsibility and playing the victim role?

1. Complaining

If you complain a lot, this might indicate that you don't take responsibility. Of course, you have reasonable reasons to complain, but that doesn't mean you have to complain all the time. Complaining won't do you any good; rather, it will spread negative energy between you and the people around you.

You might think that all people complain. Of course, we do, as we are human beings. However, you should not stress yourself when you do it. The difference depends on how often you complain because when complaining becomes a habit, that is the problem.

2. Blaming others

When you blame others, you don't take any responsibility. Others might indeed be at fault, and you might have good reasons for blaming, but what good is it to you? Most importantly, what will it cost you?

Although others might be wrong, you are still responsible for how you react and act. Treating fire with fire is not the most effective way to progress, at least not if you want to choose happiness and achieve more success.

3. Making excuses

Making excuses is the final clue that you might be avoiding responsibility. It is even more deceptive because excuses are often unconscious mental observations you make, and of course, some excuses are valid too.

Perhaps, you lack the experience to do a particular job. For example, instead of avoiding the task completely, find someone to help you, or a way to get the experience you need. This is the responsibility through which you will progress in life.

3 easy steps to accept personal responsibility

Now that you know what personal responsibility means, and you are probably aware of the moments when you avoid it, the next step is to develop this habit. How can you begin to take on more responsibility?

There are many ways. Let's focus on the basis of personal responsibility, so you'll be setting yourself up for massive success and happiness.

Step 1: Practicing self-awareness

Awareness is always the first step. Fortunately, it is very easy to spot the signs of avoiding responsibility, but the problem is that most people notice them only when they complain or blame. Furthermore, instead of being responsible, they subconsciously seek validation for their complaining. This can happen to everyone.

The difference is that self-awareness makes you more aware that you are doing it. When that happens, you can decide to make a shift and take responsibility. So, how to practice self-awareness? By reviewing or better yet, journaling for example.

So, review the moments of your day. When did you not take responsibility? Did you complain that day? Did you say things you shouldn't have said?

Although you can no longer change the previous situation, you plant a seed of awareness. When you do this often enough, you begin to see new patterns, and then you can interrupt and change them. While developing self-awareness takes time, it is worth the effort.

Step 2: Asking better questions

You will always find answers to the questions you ask yourself, and the answers you get determine your focus. You can use this simple idea to strengthen or weaken yourself.

The problem with questions is that many people ask themselves the wrong questions, such as: "Why does this always happen to me?" or "Why can't I do this?"

Your brain will try to answer these questions. In general, it does a pretty good job of finding some answers that, unfortunately, are not the ones that enable you in this case.

Now imagine changing the questions you ask yourself. For example: "How can I make the most of this situation?" or "What is one small thing I can do today to get closer to my goals?" You will find answers to these questions as well.

Do you want to experience the power of questions? Review each question for a minute, then notice the difference in the quality of the answers you get.

When you accept personal responsibility, you begin to ask yourself better questions, but until you do so, it will work in the opposite direction. As you practice asking yourself better questions, you will develop personal responsibility.

Step 3: Doing the things you say you will do

Here's one last easy tip: when you say you'll do something or when you make a promise to yourself and others, do it. Doing so builds confidence in yourself and in your relationships.

Of course, sometimes you will have to compromise. Maybe you can't set a deadline, or something unexpected happens that makes you fail to keep your promise. When this affects other people, inform them proactively while looking for a solution too.

When it only affects you, also think of solutions. The idea is not to make an excuse, but to make a new promise to make up for it, and be sure to follow through. Taking personal responsibility by following through on your promises builds trust.

In conclusion

You have now learned what personal responsibility is and how it benefits you in your life. After learning three easy steps, you can develop personal responsibility by taking the initiative.

Just remember that taking responsibility is a process that takes time and effort, and also understand that you can still make mistakes.

After all, you are just a human being. However, with some practice, you will surely enjoy more happiness, success, and personal freedom.